Since Alan now refuses to drive, our heroes are joined by Cammy’s older brother Dominic. Cammy stands four feet behind him to avoid association with his costume. Alan is less surly than usual. Byron is stuck carrying the empty tub of popcorn.
Byron: I think that movie made me a man.
Cammy: It was fun. Bane sounded like Sean Connery put through a Fruity Loops filter, but it was fun.
Alan: It’s nice to see the tradition of a trilogy’s third movie falling flat on its face broken.
Cammy: Return of the King is the best Lord of the Rings movie if you leave twenty minutes early.
Alan: True.
Dominic: This is the first one of these movies I’ve liked.
Byron: Really? You came here in costume and everything.
Cammy: He’s on a jihad against Christopher Nolan.
Dominic: It’s not a Jihad. It’s a fatwa at best. I just think Nolan tries too hard to be realistic.
Alan: Are you serious? We’re talking about the series where a billionaire stumbles upon a ninja temple, blows it up, goes on a vigilante rampage, and saves the city from magic fear gas without breaking a sweat.
Dominic: Well-
Alan: Followed by said ninja billionaire fighting a serial murderer in clown makeup on a murder spree that would make most terrorists blush. If this is your definition of excessive realism, I’d like to see what daily life looks like through your eyes. It sounds exciting.
Dominic: I guess you have a point.
Byron: So where was the Occupy Wall Street stuff? My Dad was talking about that.
Alan: There is none. Has your Dad heard of the French Revolution? In fact, has he heard of France?
Byron: Honestly? Probably not. Unless Rush Limbaugh’s had an episode about it.
Cammy: I loved that stretch of the movie. I have a soft spot for civilization folding in on itself. I just think the first act had no reason to exist.
Byron: It showed Batman brought low.
Cammy: The second act did that.
Alan: It set Bane up as a threat.
Cammy: The second act did that.
Dominic: It’s the closest we’ll get to a “Dark Knight Returns” movie.
Cammy: What was that? All I heard was “Boy, I sure wish I’d had a date in the last three years.”
Dominic: I had one.
Cammy: You paid Elena. That’s closer to an escort.
Dominic: Details.
Byron: Who are you dressed up as?
Dominic: Calendar Man. As if it isn’t obvious.
Byron: Oh…of course…
Cammy: Byron goes outside on occasion.
Byron: I’d rather not get pulled into this.
Alan: Calendar Man’s a pretty interesting choice. He had a good turn in the Long Halloween. If you were going for obscure, I might have chosen Firefly or Blockbuster.
Cammy: Oh god, you too with the comic books?
Alan: I dabble. Besides, you’ve got a Tank Girl t-shirt.
Cammy: What? It’s a movie, not a comic book.
Dominic: …There are several dozen issues.
Alan: More importantly, that movie sucked like a black hole.
Byron: Wouldn’t it be great to have your own Batcycle?
Cammy: I’d rather have the Bat-Teleporter he used to get back to Gotham.
Dominic: Or an evening with Anne Hathaway.
Alan: Or several billion dollars, a perfect physique, and nigh-unstoppable martial arts skills.
Byron: Point. When do you think they’ll make another Batman movie?
Alan: Nolan says this is the last one. It’s a logical stopping point in Batman’s cinematic evolution.
Byron: Oh. So four years?
Alan: At most.