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More Everything, Even More Abridged
Everything Abridged , Site Stuff

More Everything, Even More Abridged

As I’ve said one or six thousand times, Everything Abridged is the best thing I’ve written. Now it’s coming in […]

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: February 3, 2023February 4, 2023
My 1-900-HOTDOG Greatest Hits
Featured Elsewhere , Site Stuff

My 1-900-HOTDOG Greatest Hits

1-900-HOTDOG did a truly generous countdown of my best columns of the year. For the last endorphins on the internet, […]

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: December 23, 2022
The Book Launch to End All Book Launches
Site Stuff

The Book Launch to End All Book Launches

Free diamonds and cocaine will be distributed. Get your ticket now (it helps me out).

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: May 14, 2022May 15, 2022
My Book’s on Sale
Site Stuff

My Book’s on Sale

Friends, Romans, countrymen: Everything Abridged preorders are 25% off at Barnes & Noble, via the code PREORDER25. Rejoice!

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: April 21, 2022April 21, 2022
Come to My Party
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Come to My Party

My book Everything Abridged is launching at Powerhouse Arena in New York, on May 24th. Odds are I’ll be in […]

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: April 8, 2022April 9, 2022
Get History’s Favorite book for less
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Get History’s Favorite book for less

Want 25% off the perfect book? Of course you do. From now until Friday, Everything Abridged is 25% off Barnes […]

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: January 26, 2022January 27, 2022
The New Yorker Interviewed Me About Pranks
Articles , Site Stuff

The New Yorker Interviewed Me About Pranks

It’s a fun read, take a look here. Or grab the print issue from the mile-high stack in my home.

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: November 2, 2021November 3, 2021
I’m in the New Yorker. No, really.
Articles , Site Stuff

I’m in the New Yorker. No, really.

Somehow, I’m in this week’s New Yorker. Due to my back catalog, I’ll point out that this isn’t a prank […]

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: October 15, 2021October 15, 2021
A New Home For Your Money
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A New Home For Your Money

I’ve gotten suggestions to sell merch from twenty different people in three different languages. After ignoring all that, I’ve had […]

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: September 7, 2021September 8, 2021
Preorder Everything Abridged by Dennard Dayle (Me) and Save the World
Articles , Site Stuff

Preorder Everything Abridged by Dennard Dayle (Me) and Save the World

After almost thirty years of being Dennard Dayle, I can say that it’s mostly been for this. My book Everything […]

by: Dennard Dayle (Blind Monkey)Posted on: August 31, 2021November 18, 2021

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"I never knew reading Everything Abridged would make me so much stronger, faster, more virile."
-John Matrix

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