FADE IN:
Dramatic music swells.
A mixed couple walks down the street, discussing nothing in particular.
NARRATOR
We’re better than this.
A woman in a hijab uses a vending machine. A lone tear rolls down a patriot’s cheek.
NARRATOR
We can’t keep letting this happen.
A black teenager exists, unshot.
NARRATOR
It’s time for a change.
We rapidly cut between the resolute faces of real Americans. They know what needs to be done to preserve a future for real American children.
NARRATOR
It wasn’t always like this. The Dollar Shave Club remembers when this nation was great. And it’s up to each of us defend that legacy, whatever it takes. Starting with you.
Back to the couple. The white woman looks over her shoulder. There’s a shirtless, Aryan Adonis lifting heavy objects at the construction site across the street. He flashes her a smile, and she imagines what could be.
NARRATOR
Do you let degeneracy go unchallenged?
Back to the vending machine. The woman pops open her soda. An ICE agent gently but firmly taps her on the shoulder.
NARRATOR
Or do you take a stand?
The black teenager continues existing. A metallic click is heard offscreen.
FADE TO BLACK.
NARRATOR
We aren’t worried about the best men can be. Because we know we’re the best.
The Dollar Shave Club: Our razors will not be replaced.