Mute Monkey

The Text, Part II: The Five Tenets

Rejoice! For I, your anonymous prophet, shall now outline for you the five tenets of Millenialism. It is the will […]

“We are the middle children of history. Born too late to explore the world, born to early to explore the […]

Drinks

A pleasant summer evening at Snark Is The Night. It’s livelier tonight than it’s been in a while; a new […]

I’m no genius. Just a guy who enjoys the use of false modesty. So, as a gesture of humility, I’ve […]

(Blind Monkey and Mute Monkey are switching series this month. Happy April Fools Day, or something like it.) The ongoing […]

Drinks

KENT plays a game involving ice cubes and sugar packets while leaning against his side of the bar, alone. He […]

Here’s the good news: Human beings are basically good. Here’s the bad news: Human beings are (almost) irrevocably fucked. Because […]

Besides the legion of manchildren that have rallied behind Lauren Faust under a banner of mass-persecution complex disguised as self-assuredness, […]

Drinks

The cold light of day hits the apartment of TERRY KEANE, who lies face down in a bowl of ice […]

Drinks

Dead calm at Snark Is The Night; its four most infamous patrons have not yet arrived. KENT, alone save a […]