Today’s Fortune: You’re one more minute on your phone away from Nirvana.
Uvalde officers released footage set to “Yakkety Saks.”
Climate skeptics denied the existence of London.
Monkeypox vaccines were awarded via raffle.
I read about the Henan bank run too late to make an amazing joke about it.
NASA took a photo of Jupiter’s good side.
Op-Ed flamebait explored the depths of the Marianas Trench.
Man, it would suck to get COVID again.
I have COVID again. Because of multiple disorders, I’m still trying to push my lifting numbers. If I die of blunt dumbbell trauma, tell the press an intruder did it.
In fact, say the NYPD did it. We’re still not quite squared away.
Consider mercy at the digital guillotine. A misguided tweet shouldn’t surprise anyone: microblogging is, by design, about stray thoughts and compulsive self-promotion. That’s not an enterprise that breeds deep thinking.
Sometimes, I doubt myself. Then I stand tall, point at the mirror, and say “You already quit your job. If you don’t keep writing you’ll starve to death.”
It works pretty well. If the next book never comes, I ran out of rice cakes.
What’s i tell c? Why did sane gods allow it? My monthly 1-900-HOTDOG column explores just that.
My book Everything Abridged is still extant, and I still think you’d love it.
My parody of conservative op-eds aged extremely well/horribly.
Weeaboo Hell returns when I can record without killing Sam.
I have one or two tentacle jokes to finish in my 1-900-HOTDOG column.
Three New Yorker volleys are in suspended animation. I look forward to you seeing them, of course.
My good fiction news creeps closer.
One Sentence Reviews
Saint Seiya (Manga, First 70 Chapters): Slightly repetitive, and slightly repetitive, but slightly repetitive. (3/5)
Inuyashiki, Vol. 1: The gorefest from the Gantz guy, not the fantasy-romance. (4/5)
Chainsaw Man (Manga Return): CHAINSAW MAN! (Hell/Yes)
What’s the best way to read Everything Abridged?
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