Extra Evil: Gold Roger’s Secret

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Today’s Fortune:  Blue wire.


My Boris Johnson impression will never see a stage.

NASA shared the universe’s baby pictures.

Trump’s Treason Season demo leaked.

Vince McMahon brought his maximalist approach to sex crimes.

I don’t have to mention Tesla until another car blows.

Falling fuel prices saved open mics throughout the nation.

War Journal

Do audiences like being thanked? When I find it in forewords, I jump ahead to chapter one. Almost everyone is more interested in the product than being thanked for its existence.

Spare me one paragraph of hypocrisy. Thank you. When no one listened, I could feel pieces of my brain flying away.


I’m going on a cruise! You won’t miss an update, but I’m not sure you’ll get an extra out of it either. The ever-excellent Michael Estrin kind of scooped me on “satirist comments on cruise culture” bit.


Despite your trust, I’ve kept something from you. I was afraid it might change our relationship, but now I realize only honesty can save it.

I love glam metal. I get the same charge from it as Norwegians shouting about Satan. There is no irony in my Poison karaoke.

I hope we can move forward, together.


Asking if Biden will run is odd. Any human being with a 0.5% chance of victory is going to run, even if it destroys their family for generations. The Oval Office is the ring of power, without the subtlety.. If beheading your mother granted a five percent chance of taking Iowa, we’d have more matricides than governors.

The Present

I finally delivered my rejected Modern Love column. I’m very fond of how it came out, and double-encourage you to read it.


My monthly 1-900-HOTDOG column touched on a doomed manga that’s haunted my thoughts for some time. I love the opportunity to write there, and hope you love the results.


My book Everything Abridged is still extant, and I still think you’d love it.


Weeaboo Hell is still chipping away at Naruto.

The Past

My parody of conservative op-eds aged extremely well/horribly.

The Future

Sam’s in Ireland, more Weeaboo Hell when he lands.


My next column might get me in trouble.


The next hotdog column is coming along.


I may have some good fiction news in the near future.


If you know any places that would be interested in a short documentary, hit me up. Seriously.

One Sentence Reviews

Stavros Halkias – Live  At The Lodge Room: I haven’t listened to Cumtown yet, so I may like this much more or less in the near future. (3/5)

AEW: Forbidden Door: No Tanahashi reign, no five. (4/5)

Gigant: The most effort anyone’s put into plotting, drawing, and reflecting on a Giantess fetish. (3/5)

The Boys – Season 3: The long dictatorship of subtlety is over. (4.5/5)

Open Question

What was the nadir of the Modern Love bit?

Signing off

Thanks for reading Extra Evil, the newsletter destined for the throne. Spread it like misinformation.