I stand accused of burning down the 23rd St. Shake Shack on August 23, 2013. I do not dispute that the arson occurred. The ashen husk of the burger franchise […]
“We’re Hiring”
I’m sympathetic to the executive branch’s struggle. So I’ve written, printed, and mass-mailed a few posters to help. -Blind Monkey
The Perfect Birthday Gift.
Another birthday. I could tell you about all my personal growth, if I was a liar. I hold myself to a higher standard. Over the last year, I have learned […]
We Can’t Judge Brett Kavanaugh by the Arsons of His Youth
I’ll be the first to admit that blocking Merrick Garland’s nomination was a disgrace. American discourse may never recover from the descent of Supreme Court nominations into partisan politics. That […]
Friendwall is Your Friend
Facebook isn’t the only company on an apology tour.
Ruby Is Instagram
My client, the very real not-fake person Ruby Coen, has taken the next step forward in her career. After writing I Drew Your Soul, the first and last poetry collection, […]
The Next Fifty Mass Shootings
1. A disaffected teenage gamer is one of twenty-three pedestrians gunned down by an enthusiastic white nationalist. 2. A derivative retread of Sandy Hook. 3. A good guy with a […]
Hollywood Jim
Dear WrestleDome, Imagine me, last Wednesday, nursing a lethal hangover. I’m eating a Protein Brick on a stalled 2 train when I notice Hollywood Jim standing two passengers away from […]
Injustice For All, Part Twenty-Two
A spoon full of photoshop makes the medicine go down.
Injustice For All, Part Twenty-One
As a dog returns to his own vomit, so the fool returns to his folly.