“Not these ****** again.” Jason leaned back as far as one could reasonably be expected to lean back in a barstool. In the end, he just looked like he was […]
Tag: comedy
Make Me PRISM Spokesman
I recently offered my lying skills to the NSA. Oddly enough, the men in charge haven’t hired me as the official PRISM spokesperson yet. In order to gain some momentum, […]
A Humble Offer for the NSA
It’s a busy time for you. We live in an age where a teen’s temper-tantrum gets him arrested for “terroristic threats.” The American people spend most of their time huddled […]
This Week at MWT Regional HQ
Sam “Mute Monkey” LaGow lies awake in bed at around Four AM in his bedroom in Yorktown Heights, New York. Sitting at the foot of his bed are hallucinations of […]
Last Week at MWT HQ
Dennard “Blind Monkey” Dayle sits at the head of a table in a dingy apartment in Rutherford, New Jersey. Sam “Mute Monkey” Lagow and Josh “Deaf Monkey” Crawford sit on […]
Ask Doctor Maximus: Round Four
Doctor Maximus is a part time advice columnist and full time supervillain. In this column, he answers questions from the masses instead of terrorizing them. Mostly. Dear Doctor Maximus, I’m […]
2012 in Verse
Apocalypse The mighty Quetzalcoatl is late I acted assuming his arrival I’ve committed crimes in every state Stole the lives and women of my rivals I drank until I sealed […]
At the Movies: Skyfall
The ongoing adventures of the last three twenty year olds on Earth paying for movies. Our heroes are: Alan: Critical cynicism writ large. Should spend less time on 4chan. Byron: […]
At the Movies: Repo! The Genetic Opera
After watching Christopher Nolan’s bank account grow in real time, Alan sleeps peacefully. His dreams about Catwoman’s jumpsuit are interrupted by furious knocking. Alan: It’s 2 AM. If it isn’t […]